Something to think about

I received this in an e-mail and thought others could appreciate it as much as I do.

A Walk in My Shoes

C. Waeltermann, 2007

Twas the Night Before Christmas

And all through the house

The creatures were stirring

Yes, even the mouse

We tried melatonin

And gave a hot bath

But the holiday jitters

They always distract

The children were finally

All nestled in bed

When nightmares of terror

Ran through my OWN head

Did I get the right gift

The right color

And style

Would there be a tantrum

Or even, maybe, a smile?

Our relatives come

But they don’t understand

The pleasure he gets

Just from flapping his hands.

“He needs discipline,” they say

“Just a well-needed smack,

You must learn to parent..”

And on goes the attack

We smile and nod

Because we know deep inside

The argument is moot

Let them all take a side

We know what it’s like

To live with the spectrum

The struggles and triumphs

Achievements, regressions….

But what they don’t know

And what they don’t see

Is t! he joy that we feel

Over simplicity

He said “hello”

He ate something green!

He told his first lie!

He did not cause a scene!

He peed on the potty

Who cares if he’s ten

,He stopped saying the same thing

Again and again!

Others don’t realize

Just how we can cope

How we bravely we hang on

At the end of our rope

But what they don’t see

Is the joy we can’t hide

When our children with autism

Make the tiniest stride

We may look at others

Without the problems we face

With jealousy, hatred

Or even distaste,

But what they don’t know

Nor sometimes do we

Is that children with autism

Bring simplicity.

We don’t get excited

Over expensive things

We jump for joy

With the progress work brings

Children with autism

Try hard every day

That they make us proud

More than words can say.

They work even harder

Than you or I

To achieve something small

To reach a star in the sky

So to those who don’t get it

Or can’t get a clue

Take a walk in my shoes

And I’ll assure you…

That even 10 minutes

Into the walk

You’ll look at me

With the respect, even shock.

You will realize

What it is I go through

And the next time you judge

I can assure you

That you won’t say a thing

You’ll be quiet and learn,

Like the years that I did

When the tables were turned.

Christmas

Christmas was fun at our house. Logan still really wasn't that into opening any gifts. He'd stick his finger in and pull a piece of wrapping paper off and then expect someone else to do the rest. He did enjoy everyone elses gifts as usual. He enjoyed playing with Ryan's toys or taking Katie's stuffed Tigger. He'd sneak the Tigger and run to the playroom with it so he could chew on his tail. He was a good boy on Christmas Eve; he slept through the night in his bed in his room with NO MOMMY OR DADDY with him. IT was wonderful as I'd stayed up until after midnight helping Santa wrap gifts. I started around 8:15 or so and with a few Ryan interruptions the rest of the time was spent on the floor wrapping up everything,

Logan was really excited to see what Santa had brought but then kind of got bored. I am not sure what his favorite toy was; either Ryan's talking Eeyore or the Santa Clause that we had out as a decoration. He'd run up to the decorations and say "Santa!" so we finally gave up and handed it to him. He was very content to sit in his chair pressing the button and listening to Santa talk for quite a while. Ryan didn't seem to care about unwrapping his gifts either. He did sit up and notice the Elmo guitar and the Elmo Garage. He loved the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse that Karen and Alex "bought" for them (Curtis went to WM with the gift cards they gave us and purchased it for them). I have a little video on the family site that shows Katie and Ryan pressing the button and just cracking up. They did that for at least 30 minutes last night before getting bored and wandering off to play.

I'm hoping that by next year both boys will be more into the Santa and unwrapping the presents fun. Katie started off very neat; handing each piece of paper she'd pulled off but by the end of the presents she was ripping it off and tossing it all over. What a sight to see!!!

Beginning of the holiday break

Today was the last day of school for two weeks so it has been a little hectic around here for a day or so. First, Logan isn't doing any better with sleeping through the night. In fact, he's regressed big time. The other night I sat in his room for 40 + minutes trying to get him to calm down and go back to sleep. The lights were off and I was just trying to talk to him quietly and stay calm while trying to talk him into getting back into his bed. He was having nothing to do with that idea so we moved out to the playroom couch. He was so upset and mad that it took him another hour before he would settle and go to sleep. Last night I was wrapping presents for the kids in his class so when he came out crying around 10:00 I just let him lay down on the couch and didn't fight him at all.

Ryan is still teething and the two teething tablets that I gave him right before bedtime didn't seem to last as long. The good news was he did sleep until 2:30 this morning but then he screamed so loud and long that when we were finally getting settled back into bed at 3:30 Logan came into the bedroom. I had Ryan between me and Curtis and Logan with his head on my butt at the other end of the bed. He couldn't get comfortable (yeah go figure right?!) so he was moving and making noise which made Ryan stay awake longer. I finally gave up and took Logan back out to the couch. I think he was a little mad so at one point he was either punching or kicking my foot. It was soooo sore this morning but I didn't budge too much while he was doing it, I guess I was too dead tired.

Today's party at school went off without a hitch. I was able to get Marie's cards and breakfast food into her backpack so she could take it to school with her. Her class had a nice Christmas breakfast where Logan's class had a lunch. The thought of having to go up to the school twice wasn't very appealing so I'm glad everything fit in her backpack. She wanted to bring a game so I was trying to put batteries in it when it was time to get ready for the bus so we had to run to the bus in order not to miss it. Thankfully they have a nice bus driver and she could see we were trying to get out the door and waited a little longer for us.

At lunch time, I ran to McDonald's for some fries as an extra special treat for Logan. Their fries are just about the only thing he can eat out. He doesn't get to eat out like the other kids, their class was having pizza so I thought he deserved a special treat too. I, of course, had to get Katie a bag of fries then back into the traffic to head to school with the food and gifts. I saw the class on the playground when I pulled in and Logan was so funny. He saw me wave at him and he turned his back on me as if to say, "I'm not going home with you this early so just go away!"

Once we dropped everything off the two little ones and I headed back home to try to get some cleaning and laundry done for the day. I was able to get some cute pics of Katie and Ryan playing and some of the other kids once they got home. Hopefully they will continue to get along as nicely through the entire holiday break!

I hope that everyone has a wonderful and relaxing Christmas and a very Happy New Year!

Sleeping Update

Hopefully I won't jinx myself again. This past couple of weeks (closer to a month) have been pretty exhausting when it comes to the kids (boys) sleeping through the night. Logan and his sleeping in his own bed issues and lately Ryan and his teething issues. We've been taking shifts getting up with them. Curtis will get up with them when he doesn't have to get up in the morning to work and I get up with them the rest of the time. This past weekend I finally had a few brain cells come back to life. I had Curtis pick up an inflatable twin size mattress at Target. It was cheap, less than $20.00. He had the first night watch. I blew it up, put some sheets and a comforter on it and placed it in Logan's room. Curtis dealt with him getting up a couple of times but once he realized Daddy was in the room with him he got back into bed and slept.

At 3:30 Sunday morning Logan had enough and wanted a movie on or to go out to the couch in the playroom. I think they finally gave the movie up as a lost cause around 4:30 or so and moved into the playroom. Ryan woke up around 5:30 fussy and as I had a pretty good night sleep I got up with him. Last night it was my turn on the inflatable mattress. Logan woke up around 11;00 and when he heard me say "it's okay, Mommy's here" he went back to the bed and fell asleep. Since there is no clock or light in there it gets pretty dark. That mattress isn't made for adult usage and isn't very comfortable. I was awake early thinking I really need to used the bathroom but I'm afraid to get up and wake him. I finally had to move and when I passed through the kitchen I looked at the time. It was 6:15 a.m. he made it all the way through the night while waking up only one time!!!

Logan had a nice bubble bath last night and then I put some nice warm jammies as it was supposed to only be 35 degrees through the night. I'm not sure if it was the bubble bath (with Lavender and Chamomile) or the cooler night but either way he slept right through with only one hiccup. Tonight he's going to have another bubble bath, no sugar after 5:00 p.m. and hopefully with the lows in the 40's we can have another almost full night sleep!!

Another Update

Well, I must have jinxed myself last week when I posted about Logan sleeping through the night by Christmas. He has gone back to sleeping in his bed for only a few short hours and then coming in with us. Last night I was able to lay down with him for a little while and get him to sleep but then he came in our room a short time later. When I couldn't get comfortable with him any longer I went out to the couch thinking he was following me. No, he didn't but about 20 minutes later here comes Daddy carrying my little man and saying, "he was calling for his Mommy". He proceeded to kick me and steal my blanket. Once he was comfortable he promptly fell back to sleep. (Once he was asleep I was so dead tired that I just went to sleep right there on the couch. No point in getting up so he can follow me a little while later as it was almost time to get up anyways!)

Ryan had his CS MRI last Thursday and I had not heard any results from the doctor so I called today. It seems they mailed me the results today but she went ahead and told me that it came back normal. YEAH!! We still have to go to the follow up visit with her and the visit with the neurosurgen this Thursday and then we should be done for the next six months with them.

Ryan did have a great morning at the occupational therapist. He had been having a "block" where eating anything at their office was concerned. He had vomited there a couple of weeks ago and refused to eat anything for them after that. Today started out like it had been but half way through therapy he decided he would eat for them. He played with some rice cakes and even put a cheese-it in his mouth and touched his tongue with it. Of course, it promptly came back out and flew at the therapist but hey that is some major improvement for the little guy! Way to go Ms. Corie!

Ryan also had his first visit with the early intervention speech therapist on Saturday morning. She spent about an hour with us observing him and getting "a feel" for what he needs to be working on. She is Logan's first speech therapist from a couple of years ago so it was nice to see her. Ryan did surprise me in that he didn't run away from her. He seemed to accept her and would give her things she requested but never stuck around too close to her for long. That is another improvement for the little guy too. (I think that is because he was at home and a lot more comfortable in his normal home atmosphere.)

Logan; sleeping update and other updates

Last night was a great night for sleeping. Logan stayed in his bed in his bedroom a couple hours longer than he has been. He came running in to our bedroom around 2:15 this morning and once I had him settled on the couch he went to sleep within the hour. I was able to go back to bed until 7:00 this morning. I believe at the rate he is going, maybe, just MAYBE he will be sleeping in his bed through the night by Christmas. I think that is what I'm going to ask Santa for this year.

Thursday is the day; Ryan's CS MRI is scheduled for 10:00 in Orlando. I believe that I will head out at the same time as I did for his first MRI so I don't have to deal with the traffic. Since we have to be there at 9:00 that puts us right in the middle of the morning rush. I can't stand to drive in Orlando during the off peak hours so I know I really don't want to drive it during morning (or evening for that matter!) rush hour traffic. Curtis has said he will drive him but I don't know if I can handle that. It's not like we will get the results right then and there anyway but still...... If I have to sit at home with Katie while he takes him over there I think I will be a basket case anyways. I might as well drive him so I can take my mind off the MRI while dealing with the drive and everything else. Not to mention that we will have to either wake him at 4:00 to give him a bottle or make his 10:00 (p.m. from previous night) bottle it until after MRI. Not too sure that he will be in any mood to put up with no bottle so I think waking him is the best bet.

Another reason I may as well drive him is I need to get the receipts from the copay for the MRI's. I used the flex. spending debit card and GOD forbid I don't get a copy of those receipts to them. They can tell that it's at a hospital quite a ways away from where we live and that it's not for something from the gift shop. Copays for MRI's aren't cheap but I will get the copies so I can mail them in and be done with that. I have to give the Flex. Spending people credit; they did finally add our normal therapy copays as a reoccuring expense so I don't have to mail in each of those receipts. If they had not done this we would not be considering using this again for next year.